There are so many things Blair doesn’t get about me, so many things she ultimately overlooked, and things that she would never know, and there would always be a distance between us because there were too many shadows everywhere. Had she ever made promises to a faithless reflection in the mirror? Had she ever cried because she hated someone so much? Had she ever craved betrayal to the point where she pushed the crudest fantasies into reality, coming up with sequences that she and nobody else could read, moving the game as you play it? Could she locate the moment she went dead inside? Does she remember the year it took to become that way? The fades, the dissolves, the rewritten scenes, all the things you wipe away—I now want to explain all these things to her but I know I never will, the most important one being: I never liked anyone and I’m afraid of people.
I thought you wouldn’t mind, we turned our amps up high. I thought you were sleeping, anyway. When you see the signs, have turned into lines, you’ll already have gone away. It’s been on my mind, for a long, long, long time… How could you be sleeping all these days?
If you take a step, I will make you sure that you take the next. If you tell a lie, I’ll just nod my head, yeah, I’ll let it slide. 'Cause you woke me up, and there's birds outside, and I still feel drunk. But I’m glad you did, cause last night you weren’t making that much sense.
You said you wanna die, now you say you wanna live. You said you loved me after forty-five minutes. If this is all a game, can you just say it is? I’ll do it anyway, so it makes no difference.
We should order up, wash the wine out of the coffee cup. They got bread and fruit, there’s probably not much else for you. We can lay around; you can kiss me ‘til the maids come kick us out.
It’s eleven now, so make every second count. But back in New York they can’t ever find this out. There are things we do, that we’re really not allowed… We can say anything, but we just can’t say it loud.
I hope you always find someone to take you home, to put you into bed, kiss your cheek, and check your pulse. Make sure you’re still breathing, with their hand up to your nose I wish that could be me, but it’s just not possible.